Heraldic Camelopardopahant

The Camelopardophant in the Zoo of Heraldic Beasts

You humans don’t realise how demeaning this is. And boring. For me anyhow.

The griffin, the unicorn, even the cockatrice have their fans. And Leroy over there gets a stream of visitors. “Do rampant!” They say. “Do couchant!” And he obliges. He’s a trooper.

Well, actually he’s a lion and an egomaniac. But that’s Leroy.

Not me. I don’t get the requests. Does anyone have me on a shield? The only visitors I get say: “What’s this funny looking thing?”

I say: You want funny? Look in a mirror!

No, I don’t. Can’t speak, can I? But think it and try to transmit my contempt by telepathy.

Heraldic Camelopardophant

© TheSupercargo


The above was written for the Friday Fictioneers flash fiction forum. The prompt: what appears to be a large soft toy animal with the hindquarters of a zebra, the body of a tiger, the forequarters giraffe and the trunk of an elephant. Obviously a camelopardophant! As ever the Friday Fictioneers target is 100 words – as ever I fail to hit it, but the above is only 107 words long. To see a list of links to all the responses to this week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt, click here.

24 thoughts on “The Camelopardophant in the Zoo of Heraldic Beasts”

  1. Hi, I’m new to your blog but I’ll definitely be back. Loved the picture and the story – you have a great voice for this creature and I particularly enjoyed his comments on Leroy.
    I’m the FF’s resident cutting expert and if you want to lose 7 words, try “And boring. For me anyhow” and “over there” (referring to Leroy). Not that they are bad words, just the easiest to cut without losing the voice / meaning. Just a suggestion!

    1. Thank you, Jennifer. Myself, I’m new to Friday Fictioneers. This is only my fifth story. Glad you liked “C’s” character – the relationship with Leroy was unplanned. Serendipity. 🙂
      I don’t let myself get too worried about not hitting the 100. I’ve noticed one or two other participants focusing so hard on this target their stories suffer as a result. (My opinion, of course.) That said, there’s often a word here or there that one thinks is essential but on re-reading (sometimes after publishing) one realises wasn’t. Apart from your suggestions I now see a superfluous “the”, and “try to” in the last line is unnecessary. Mind you, I also see a missing personal pronoun in the last line. Ooops! 🙂
      Nah, published is published. I’ll let it stand.
      John

    1. Thanks, Janet. The title (falling outside the 100 word limit) was a convenient place to offer an explanation of where the story was taking place.

    1. One of your favourites! That’s great 😀
      Did you make the soft toy in the photo yourself?
      I look forward to reading your story. Not had the opportunity to read anyone else’s yet as we’re celebrating Swedish National Day here at the present and I’m only now snatching a moment on the net … Tomorrow it’ll have to be.

  2. Love your illustration, and the story kind of reminded me of the first Madagascar movie where everyone just wants to see the lion striking poses! Poor little guy, I’d have him on a shield 🙂

    1. I saw a troop of chimps in a zoo once make their feeings plain. They chattered and screamed at their audience and then turned their backs on us and disappeared indoors.

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